Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Big Boys Don't Cry

Real men never, ever cry. Over anything. Not even a death in the family, not a bullet in the chest. Full stop. Case closed. You may mist up slightly in one eye only when a favourite sports legend retires, but real, macho men know just how bad life is. Real men grit their teeth and take bill after bill, war after war.

And I am all that!

I never cry. It takes a lot for me to shed a tear of two. Yes, I have a heart made of moon rock. I couldn't even remember when was the last time I did. Probably a decade ago, when I had to be consoled by my little sister when we both watched Mufasa died in The Lion King. But again, whoever, rock-hearted monster wouldnt't right?

I take pride to know I can stand tall and proud among the real, legendary alpha males; in the company of Genghis Khan, William 'Braveheart' Wallace or Sir Elton John.

So I repeat, I never cry!

But, this week, I guess I kinda broke somekind of a new record. At least in the Macho-dom. I CRIED. Gulp! Not once. Not twice. But THREE times! Over what, you may ask? Getting tetanus shot? a chipped finger nail? another lion died?! Nope. Nope. Nope. I say you won't believe this.

See, I told you, you wouldn't believe it.

It was all started when my former boss recommended this book to me (now I blame her). At first I was hesitated, cause, you know, it's essentially a love story. Something that didn't bore too well with me. The stinking cheese of that Twilight craps still linger with me that I swore never to touch any so-called 'love story/chick flicks' by any female author again...urghhh. I could die of hydration due to non-stop vomitting!

Anyhow, I made a mistake (after much coaxing) of reading the few first pages of the book. And what a big mistake it was. The book turned out to be a total unputdownable, so to speak. The next thing I know, I got this watery substance rolling down my cheeks. Damn.

It's a story about a man who time travels. The only thing that hold his life together is a woman whom he always come back to, the love of his life, throughout her existence. He met her when she was six and he was 42 and their 'life' keeps on intertwining (time-traveling-ly-speaking) since then.

Sounds like the most romantic thing you ever heard huh? The only catch is, he can't control where or when he'll be gone. So most of the times, the girl is left alone in the present, pining for her man to come around, not knowing he's in fact, always there for her somewhere, someplace, in other period of her life. A little confusing but powerfully heartbreaking stuff.

OK I cried THREE times somewhere between page one and the last page. That was a little twice as many I cried for the past ten years.

I have proven myself to be the wimp by admitting this. Or maybe machismo is simply an overrated thing, I really don't know. It is a very slippery thing. It's hard to live by the old macho code these days. Blame it on the Beckhams or the Eltons but today's men, would even cry for a pair of shoes or....God, help us all...a book!

Oh world, hear me now, and chant this loudly with me;

I am a real man. Big, sweaty, meat-eating ignorant man. I have large packages. And balls. Made of brass and metal. Well, I used to have them anyway. Now I want them back.

We want them back, do we?

Man, I pine for the sheer stupidity of the old macho days.

Saturday, December 19, 2009

What's Love Got To Do With It?

Right after the end credits rolled out, I turned to my company and asked, "Sooo, what do think?", half expectedly, I thought, he'd jump out of his seat and hail The King. Alas, he only murmured, "Oklah..." with the similar enthusiasm of getting his eyebrows plucked.

And that exactly how it was. "Oklah".

Calm down, peeps. This is not saying the movie, "AVATAR", was a major snooze-fest. In fact - if it really makes everyone happy - it was actually far from it. It was eye-popping, heart-stopping, mind-blowing, one hellava movie ride. But coming from the very same director who brought you "Titanic", I guess you should already know what to expect - true, it was technically amazing, got the grandest of setting, visually spectacular, breakthrough CGI.....and quite frankly, ehem, not so much of anything else.

OK for one thing, the movie was way, wayyyy too long. By the time it ended, I felt like I was already halfway through to Planet Pandora! I am sorry, Mr. Cameron, but my big butt and my tiny urinary bladder can only tolerate two hours of continous sitting, so please, hire a better editor!

And Sir, while you are at it, can you please find a better (preferably with conversational experience with real people) screenwriter? Honestly, the dialogues here were downright cheesy. (They've sent us a message... that they can take whatever they want. Well we will send them a message. That this... this is our land!). Cue: roll eyes. Need I say more?

And come on, Oh what's so original about "girl-meets-boy, boy-falls-in-love-with-the-girl-who happens-to-be-the-daughter-of-the-leader's-tribe, then-the-girl-finds-out-the-truth-about-the-boy-and-gets-really-upset-and-dumps-the-boy, and-the-boy-tries-to-win-back-the-girl-in-a-background-setting-of-a-major-doomed-epic-tragedy"? 'Pocahontas, 'The Last of Samurai', anyone?

Even I can summarize the three-hour long movie in less than a paragraph! I bet most spanish soap operas got more intelligent twists than this one has to offer.

Stripping down all the stunning-but-super expensive effects here, all you see is one big, giant cheeseball mess, with too many sappy, cliche-ridden lines and the acting was way too forced.

Anyway, trying not to be a further ginormous ass that I already am, I am gonna say, the movie was still worth checking out solely based on the escapism value it offers only and nothing else. If you are looking for an emotionally engaging, mentally stimulating movie, then by all mean, look elsewhere.

So, I am gonna shut my trap now and recommend this movie only to those who are really into action packed, Sci-fi, 3D blockbuster flick and/, Sam Worthington.

OK, now I talk too much. Zip.

Saturday, December 12, 2009

My Frogging December

I love December. It's the month full of festivities, weddings, mega sale and school holidays. The traffic is less maddening and I'll be out of my office most of its days, so it's very hard not to love it. December is definitely my favorite month of the year.

OK, OK, maybe they are couple of things associated with the month that bug me as well. O you know like the crowded mall, jam-packed cinemas and the mandatory, much-obliged New Year's resolutions which I despise so much. But, in the meantime I guess I'll just have to get by those annoyances by entertaining myself - like watching a movie.

A couple nights back, I managed to catch 'The Princess and The Frog' in Alamanda Putrajaya. I am pretty much sure I watched it on the first night it premiered so I guess I am entitled to bragging right, ain't I?

Anyhoo, the movie was delighfully entertaining. Being a little child trapped in a (beautiful) grownup body, I've always loved Disney's animated flicks, so there's no suprise here. (This would automatically disqualified me to write a full blown review cause you know, objectivity issues). But it was really, really an amazing movie. While I didn't expect anything less this time, I was a little overwhelmingly inspired by the take-home moral of the story - wishing is the only half of a dream, hard work is the other.

Now, coming back to what I despise the most - the New Year resolutions; having taken hint from a movie I watched earlier, this time I will just abandon them altogether. What's the point of keeping disappointing myself? I will concentrate more on the 'working on them' instead of just 'dreaming over them'. I've come to know dreams/goals/resolution isn't just about the time frame; when to start or on what day to stop. It's a perpetually continuos effort.

Who knows what'll happen to me next year. It's not like I've been caring that much what I have or have not achieved this year,so I'll just try to look forward. Even so;

I am gonna go with the flow but I will try making more wise, rightful decisions. I'll try to be less demanding and more accomodating.
I am gonna be a little more realistic. And if by the end of the day I still don't get what I want, heck, I am gonna pick myself up and do it all over again, like an enegizer bunny on steroid.

And comes New Year in a couple of weeks, I am gonna celebrate it hard. I mean really really hard. There goes another year and it's for all things I have done this year (achivements or failures, proud and shame). Bottomline, so far I am happy I did manage to make a couple of wise decisions for myself nonetheless. I have no regret, only lesson.

I am gonna celebrate it, hard. You will see, you will see. Cause I am gonna bust my butt well right after the partying ends. I promise.

Saturday, December 5, 2009

I Wish You Wouldn't Say That

It had been awhile since the last time I met my old buddy, Sulastri. It's probably about time he called me again 'cause I kinda missed how he looked like these days. Honestly, I was hoping he's fat with a shiny bald spot on the top of his head. And probably with bad back. Well, no such luck but I am still glad he still keeps my numbers.

We were quite close back then when we were both worked as management trainees in a (take a breath) hell hole, blood sucking, now-defunct, once so-called financial institution that I refuse to name. By the end of the program,we found ourselves heading to our separate ways, since he was posted to JB branch and I was here in KL. Sounds like a tragic love story eh? Only it was not!

Fast forward 10 years later, he miraculously managed to stick around with the same "hell hole" we loathed so much and I am on my 11th job now. And of course he's gotten married with two kids and me still single with two teddy bears! He went on to open a restaurant and I am just opening wound to my bruised ego! OK, sure I hate the man!

Anyway, two days ago, he was in in KL for business and was nice enough to call and invite me over for lunch, you know, to catch up. Of course I was more than willing to accommodate an old friend's request for catching up as long as he's paying, so I picked up one of my favourite cafe in KL.

Like a mother who has just reunited with her long lost daughter who ran away with an Indonesian worker, we were talking for hours. We talked about everything, we even made plan on things to do in the evening since he was planning only to go back to JB on the next day.

So we went around making plan for the second half of our 'catching up' session. We went on detailing the evening's itinerary. We kept telling ourselves we missed all the fun stuff we did together and we wanted to feel that feeling again. You know, free and young.

And then his phone rang. Or sounded more like a screech to me.

His daughters called. They missed him so much and 'begged' him to come home that night. And there and then, I knew the daughters won over an old, unmarried friend anytime.

He had to cancel our plans and said something like, "Gosh, I wish I were still single, you know like you, so I can do all all these fun stuff, guilt-free"

"Sure, you do"

Hang on, he wanted to be just like me? That didn't sound right. Somehow it didn't make me feel good about myself either.

Man, what have I done with my life?