Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Like A Virgin

Honestly, I am new to this ‘tagged’ business – I’ve never been tagged before and I guess that makes me, quite frankly, a tagged’s virgin. Thus, when Zetty offered herself to “deflowered” me a couple days ago, I was more than wiling to oblige. I know I have arrived.

So the direction went something like this;

Once you’ve been tagged, you have to write a blog/Facebook note with 16 random things, facts, habits or goals about you. At the end choose 16 people to be tagged, listing their names and why you chose them. Don’t forget to leave them a comment or tag them in your note to read this.

And here it goes:

1. I have names for my pillows – Kiki and Lulu. It preposterously complicated that it might just cause a migraine if explained, but it involves three words; deviant, kinky and horny.

2. My favourite movie of all time is The English Patient and I cried my eyeballs out watching Ghost and The Lion King. Trust me, you have no idea!

3. I have intimacy issues. I can’t be hold or kissed just by anyone. I get ticklish easily. That’s why I just settled with my Kiki and Lulu anytime I feel the 'needs' (wink! wink!).

4. I like wearing shorts. The shorter the better. I think I am in love with my thighs a litle bit too much. Friends called me Yeti, the exhibitionist.

5. I can’t eat freshwater fish. I can even smell them from miles. Especially those from Malaysian rivers or monsoon drains.

6. I enjoy killing animals. Small animals like toads, cockroaches, fleas, and erm, dogs.

7. Singing is my passion. I even once thought I really got it, well, until I was introduced to karaoke and a healthy dose of reality checks from my friends.

8. I never clipped my fingernails. I bite them

9. I’ve never been to Penang. Or Langkawi. Or Sabah. Or anywhere else that requires money.

10. I received my full driving licence only when I was 28. (Don’t ask!)

11. I can’t sleep with the lights on. Shadows freak me out. I get nightmares.

12. I don’t watch scary movies, well except, ‘Scary Movie’ and Ghost.

13. I’ve never been with one company more than two years. (Hope to break the long standing ‘tradition’ next month - knock on woods)

14. I grew up wanting to be an Olympian, first male supermodel or Vegas-bound, Jazz crooner ala Micheal Buble but alas…..

15. I want to be deeply in love and get married before I am 35. REALLY.

16. And Oh Zetty and Miron, I don’t do reunion.

Wow, 16 already? This isn’t half bad. There, all the 16 things you might or might not already know about me. I guess you can say now ‘I know my friend a little bit more than I ever hoped for and damn, it feels good’

If you're willing to go along with much of the game's silliness, the suspension of meaninglessness facts can only be stretched so far but at the end of it, at least you’ll learn something more about the people you really care.

Now, if I can just add one more thing:

17. I don’t have 16 people to be tagged. All the 16 people I know either has been tagged or won’t read this at all. So suck it.

Oh, goody, someone please tagged me some more. This, I like!

Friday, January 16, 2009


Last Tuesday afternoon, after work, I met an old friend from high school. Her name is Zetty Julia. We had a simple dinner at the KLCC food court….and before you people get – ehem - the wrong ideas; Hasmiron was there too.

Yeap, Hasmiron was there too because he wanted to discuss something super “important” with us; my presence was very “crucial” to our overall well-being, especially mine - plus he needed a ride home.

It has been awhile since the last time I saw Zetty, so the idea of ‘catching up’ with her again after these so many years excites me.

True enough, we chatted and laughed and we gossiped and laughed louder until my back hurts (literally!) And O boy, did we squeal so hard and scream that much! We talked about so many things but one theme seemed more prominent than the others through and through; ‘let’s do this again sometimes and the next time me meet, let's invite the whole class of '94!”O-oh.

Eventually it became clearer to me that she and a few of our other friends are currently planning to organize a one big 15 years Reunion, Class of ’94 sometime this year and she was here to sell the idea and to some extent to persuade us – me and Hasmiron – to come on board.

Hasmiron was super excited – no doubt about it. Me? I have my own reservations. And valid and legitimate ones too.

Call me have self-esteem of a wet toast but I do not really buy the whole idea of an organized reunion. It’s conceited and pretentious to say the least. Those people who really wanted to come are usually vindictive, showy people with something to gloat about; or they simply there to rub the faces of those people who used to torture them, with their current, much talked about “success”.

Don’t get me wrong. I certainly do not have problems with meeting old friends outside once in a while, have a few drinks and chat until the wee hours; but to dress up expensively, drag you wife (ves) and infants, throwing your business cards like you just won a presidential election and act like you are still in high school? - na’ah I don’t think so, thankyouverymuch.

……Plus, Oh alright I admit it, there are people I do not wish to see them again ever in this lifetime. NEVER. EVER. AGAIN.

Zetty and Hasmiron wanted me to be there. In fact they already assigned me with a task. I am torn.

So question: Will I crawl up from my self-hating, grumpy ol' swamp and finally show up at the Reunion or I just let it slip and subject myself to Hasmiron’s bad joke, eternally?

Only time will tell.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Love Songs

Some songs are more special than the others. We’d play them in our car, in our IPod, on our latest stereo system, in our head, over and over again until we suddenly realized, ‘hey, wait, I never really liked the singer anyway’.

Still, we like them better 'cause they are like, telling our stories - talking about our inner thoughts and summarizing our feelings – all in less than 4 minutes. So we’d be obsessed about them and ran to learn all the words and ‘interpreted’ them out loud until somebody called the UN Security Council for permanent sanction.

These songs are special because they were the closest things we get to cheaper therapy – at least we know they are total strangers out there we can “listen” to. They also can be so creepily telling and almost accurate that sometimes we think our life is one big, staged musical nobody cares to see.

Words can be beautiful and songs can be so magical but the gamut of feelings attached to everything and anything to it are simply,well, indescribable.

You're a falling star,
You're the get away car.
You're the line in the sand when I go too far.
You're the swimming pool, on an August day.
And you're the perfect thing to say.

And you play it coy, but it's kinda cute.
Ah, When you smile at me you know exactly what you do.
Baby don't pretend, that you don't know it's true.
Cause you can see it when I look at you.

And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times
It's you, it's you,
You make me sing.You're every line, you're every word, you're everything.

You're a carousel, you're a wishing well,
And you light me up, when you ring my bell.
You're a mystery, you're from outer space,
You're every minute of my everyday.

And I can't believe, uh that I'm your man,
And I get to kiss you baby just because I can.
Whatever comes our way, ah we'll see it through,
And you know that's what our love can do.

(My Everything, Michael Buble)

Aw, I know I am a mushy, spineless, vomit-inducing, hopeless romantic, but I can’t help it. I am just, erm, well, happy. So what’s more to it?

If you are so naïve as to ask ‘why’, I will answer it, but it is not worth wasting words on.

Wednesday, January 7, 2009

The Bleak Truth

Rihanna taking no wardrobe risks for Malaysia show

By SEAN YOONG – 11 hours ago

KUALA LUMPUR, Malaysia (AP) — The good girl gone bad has promised to be good for one night. R&B sensation Rihanna will shun skimpy outfits when she performs in Malaysia next month, said the concert's organizers on Tuesday.

The Malaysian organizers of Rihanna's Feb. 13 stop on her "Good Girl Gone Bad" tour voiced hopes that protests would not mar the Grammy-winning singer's show.

Rihanna's management is "aware of the country's regulations and the difficulties of doing a show," Razman Razali, managing director of Pineapple Concerts, told The Associated Press. However, a district branch of the opposition Pan-Malaysian Islamic Party, which blasted Lavigne's on-stage moves as "too sexy" last year, said in an online commentary that Rihanna was "sexier and more dangerous" than Lavigne.
Isn’t sad how some people grip on the lives is so precarious that they’ll embrace any preposterous delusion rather than face an occasional bleak truth?

Monday, January 5, 2009

30 Seconds To Live

I am a nerd. There, I said it. I am wearing big, thick glasses and I can’t seem to grow hair on my head; my favorite TV channels are History Channel and Nickelodean and I think the coolest American Idol ever is Taylor Hicks (OK, now that’s weird!)

So when somebody says I am nerd or 'weird', gee, I am not sure I want to argue with that. I guess I am just proud wearing the badge.

But what I saw on a documentary on History Channel last Saturday was something mind-blowing and life changing. It gave me a whole new meaning of life, as we know it. It really changed the way I perceived things. Y'know, those little things. Like – us.

Not sure you follow? Now just consider this;

If the 4.5 billion history of planet Earth were to be condensed in 24 hours, human existence would only count for 30 seconds.

Wow. Can you believe that? We are just a tiny fraction in the grand scheme of things. I feel small and insignificant. I think we’re should all do. To be clear, I am not talking about damage to the larger systems, I am just saying there is more to life than what we make it to be.

The lesson and knowledge I took in from the documentary were many. Among them; Life is short so live your life to the fullest as if you only have 30 seconds to do that. It really did open my eyes. I want to make a change and leave a legacy to the humankind like solving climate change issues, finding new flu strains or curing cancers when I am gone but for now I want to start small.

Like answering question that haunts many of us, “When we die, how would we like to be remembered with?”

O yes, we all want to be Taylor Hicks, but have we really done something about it?

Damn, I haven’t lived!

Thursday, January 1, 2009

For A Happier and Healthier New Year!

In perfectly normal circumstances I do like letters. Especially when there’s the word ‘Urusan Seri Paduka Baginda’ written on it. Isn’t it great to be referred to something or anything at all? You feel wanted - the sense of self-importance kinda attached to it. That is why, I usually welcome them.

But not this one.

Well it happened anyway. On the very morning of the last day of 2008

Now tell me how exactly should I be the least of thrilled to be receiving this; or to completely ignore the bone-rattling word ‘Pakar Bedah’ boldly printed on it? Forgive my remorseless skeptic self and not being a sport but this is simply not how I picture the New Year joy.

Gosh, I guess by now, everybody knows already, 2008 was such a bad year for me – health wise. Things were going down south since after Raya last year. Something’s terribly not right there, to the point that I sometimes think I’d be upsetting the natural balance of things if I didn’t “catch on” anything ever since.

So how did I cope with this little pickle in a butt ? Well, if you must know, I watched 30 Rock Marathon on Star World the whole New Year's morning and finished it off with Ally McBeal two seasons straight on DVD. I was in dire need of consoling. I wasn’t crying - that’s not how I roll – but there’s a sad little part in me keep asking, “Where’s your spine and chord? Stop being a whiner and RESOLUTE!!” Then suddenly I got it all figure out.

This year I am gonna take a special, no, an extra special care of myself. I WILL watch what I eat and WILL exercise a little bit more. And O NEVER forget to brush my teeth regularly.

Lord, I am gonna get through this and hopefully be able to add one more thing in my ‘I Am Awesome‘ book by the end of the year and that is all my resolution this year. Not much, I know, but I am not kidding about it.

Sigh. (I sighed a lot these days, didn't I?)

When you start your New Year this bad, things couldn’t get any worse, right?


O Give me a break!