A Crazy Friend

A Crazy Friend: Why are you so secretive about your new job?

Me: I am not.

A Crazy Friend: How much do you make over there?

Me: …..

A Crazy Friend: See?

Me: How much do you make now?

A Crazy Friend: My salary is RM5, 800. My side income as a secret agent averages RM2, 000 – RM3, 000 every month. Your turn.

Me: …

A Crazy Friend: This is so typical of you. You know, last night, I was watching Oprah and she was interviewing Matthew McConaughey . She said, “Okay, let’s talk about your new movie. You are getting USD10 million, right?” And his face gets all pinched, and he says he’s not going to discuss money. Too private. What is up with that?

Me: I think it’s natural not to want to discuss income, because when you do, you seem to be either bragging or complaining. Plus, whatever the numbers, you become an object of idiotic gossip and debate. No, I don’t discuss money. I think it’s weird that you do.

A Crazy Friend: No, I think it’s weird that you think people want to gossip, much less debate about your income.

Me: But you did ask about my income!

A Crazy Friend: That’s because I thought you wanted to spill.

Me: (Confused) Am I being taped there?

A Crazy Friend: Whoa, you really think you are Matthew McConaughey now, aren’t you?

Me: ???