It’s going to be another year in a week, so maybe it’s time to look back and regret all those stupid things I have done all year long. Nah. I guess I am too busy fixing the damages that I totally forget to wallow in self-pity.
Which, funnily enough, brings me to another revelation: What would another regretful year be without a New Year resolution – a chance to do it all over again?
Well, I tell you what happened to me for last few days that would define my next year's hope and my new way of life:
I was at Giant Supermarket, Maju Junction the other day. I was holding a tub of chocolate ice cream, contemplating whether to buy.
But I walked away, so I saved RM7.99
Last weekend, I looked at my comfy and cozy bed, it must me nice to get a long nice afternoon nap, but then I saw my swimming bag.
I grabbed the bag and walked away, so I can lose ½ kg
Yesterday, at office I saw two people were fighting over a boyfriend. I felt embarrassed. I simply refused to get sucked into the middle of things.
So I walked away.
To tell you the truth, it’s the best and easiest way I know to maintain my mental health and stability. I simply refuse to deal with dramas heartbreaks anymore. It may be not be right choice. It may be a coward act but I never intend to hurt anyone. It’s a choice I made for myself and not for someone else.
Walking away from all negativity that surround me all these years and from those things that prevent me from achieving my goals - be it financial, weight or social aspect - are the things I really look forward to next year.
So maybe walking away from all those things or people that bog me down would be the best New Year’s resolution for me.
Anyway, how hard is it to leave?
It’s my wacky, serious, skittish heartfelt attempt to share my jagged route to happiness with other people I love.
Thursday, December 27, 2007
Saturday, December 22, 2007
The New Beginning
I bought a new phone, so I am trying its new feature - phone blogging. Cool eh?
For the longest time, I kept telling myself I needed a new phone. Heck, my mom kept bugging to get a new one. She had been complaining on how she could barely heard my voice over that old junk of mine, but did I listen? Nooooo. So what changed my mind? One damn good salesman.
I am not ready to reveal what model that bowled me over - just yet. I don't want to jink it. People will rush and buy it in a double and thus it will lose its prestiges (They called it 'trendsetter effect'). But here's some clue:
1. Slim size
2. Sony Ericsson
3. 3G
4. Great photo quality
5. Black color
6. Music function
7. New model
All checks
I am in a dire need of an upgraded - one at a time. And yes, this is just the beginning.
p/s And O, I purposely tilted the pictures above to give the subject an extra mysterious, enigmatic effect. (As I always do)
Thursday, December 20, 2007
Reasons To Be Merry/The Lovely Bones
I have reasons to be excited today. Yes, yes, of course it's Hari Raya Aidiladha and I am blissfully on my 5 days leave.
So what would I do with all those free times? Surfing the net of course, and what did I find on the O-so great fountain of know-what?
Well if you must know, I googled the most anticipating movie of all times (At least in 'my times!') is well underway. The movie expected to premier on 13th March 2009, so mark your calendar, guys!
Now, I shall embark on book-reading mission, which I rarely do. I am soo gonna get the book soon and get it finished before the premier. Looks like at least I have another year to accomplish that.
I know I can just link this to my link box but it doesn't feel right. My gut says you won't probably read it. You see, it's important for you guys to see why I lost my mind and go completely ga - ga over this. So here it is.. (Don't cheat!)
When we first meet Susie Salmon, she is already in heaven. As she looks down from this strange new place, she tells us, in the fresh and spirited voice of a fourteen-year-old girl, a tale that is both haunting and full of hope.
In the weeks following her death, Susie watches life on Earth continuing without her-her school friends trading rumors about her disappearance, her family holding out hope that she'll be found, her killer trying to cover his tracks. As months pass without leads, Susie sees her parents' marriage being contorted by loss, her sister hardening herself in an effort to stay strong, and her little brother trying to grasp the meaning of the word gone.
And she explores the place called heaven. It looks a lot like her school playground, with the good kind of swing sets. There are counselors to help newcomers adjust and friends to room with. Everything she ever wanted appears as soon as she thinks of it-except the thing she most wants: to be back with the people she loved on Earth.
With compassion, longing, and a growing understanding, Susie sees her loved ones pass through grief and begin to mend. Her father embarks on a risky quest to ensnare her killer. Her sister undertakes a feat of remarkable daring. And the boy Susie cared for moves on, only to find himself at the center of a miraculous event.
The Lovely Bones is luminous and astonishing, a novel that builds out of grief the most hopeful of stories. In the hands of a brilliant new writer, this story of the worst thing a family can face is transformed into a suspenseful and even funny novel about love, memory, joy, heaven, and healing.
-Taken from Amazon's book summary of "The Lovely Bones" by Alice Sebold
..and if you don't get teary eyes and get as exited as I do, I don't know what will. You are probably damned heartless Robot who feeds on other people sufferings!
And just in case you wonder what's with all the hoopla....yes, PETER JACKSON on the helm.
So what would I do with all those free times? Surfing the net of course, and what did I find on the O-so great fountain of know-what?
Well if you must know, I googled the most anticipating movie of all times (At least in 'my times!') is well underway. The movie expected to premier on 13th March 2009, so mark your calendar, guys!
Now, I shall embark on book-reading mission, which I rarely do. I am soo gonna get the book soon and get it finished before the premier. Looks like at least I have another year to accomplish that.
I know I can just link this to my link box but it doesn't feel right. My gut says you won't probably read it. You see, it's important for you guys to see why I lost my mind and go completely ga - ga over this. So here it is.. (Don't cheat!)
When we first meet Susie Salmon, she is already in heaven. As she looks down from this strange new place, she tells us, in the fresh and spirited voice of a fourteen-year-old girl, a tale that is both haunting and full of hope.
In the weeks following her death, Susie watches life on Earth continuing without her-her school friends trading rumors about her disappearance, her family holding out hope that she'll be found, her killer trying to cover his tracks. As months pass without leads, Susie sees her parents' marriage being contorted by loss, her sister hardening herself in an effort to stay strong, and her little brother trying to grasp the meaning of the word gone.
And she explores the place called heaven. It looks a lot like her school playground, with the good kind of swing sets. There are counselors to help newcomers adjust and friends to room with. Everything she ever wanted appears as soon as she thinks of it-except the thing she most wants: to be back with the people she loved on Earth.
With compassion, longing, and a growing understanding, Susie sees her loved ones pass through grief and begin to mend. Her father embarks on a risky quest to ensnare her killer. Her sister undertakes a feat of remarkable daring. And the boy Susie cared for moves on, only to find himself at the center of a miraculous event.
The Lovely Bones is luminous and astonishing, a novel that builds out of grief the most hopeful of stories. In the hands of a brilliant new writer, this story of the worst thing a family can face is transformed into a suspenseful and even funny novel about love, memory, joy, heaven, and healing.
-Taken from Amazon's book summary of "The Lovely Bones" by Alice Sebold
..and if you don't get teary eyes and get as exited as I do, I don't know what will. You are probably damned heartless Robot who feeds on other people sufferings!
And just in case you wonder what's with all the hoopla....yes, PETER JACKSON on the helm.
Thursday, December 13, 2007
“I Am Gonna Beat The Crap Out Of Somebody”
It was 6.56am. I was walking towards my car when I saw something that worried the hell out of me. Some moron decided to ruin my shirt by double-parking behind my car.
O oh. This can’t be good.
My heart was pounding like crazy yet I proceeded to my car. I put my backpack in the car, walked slowly to the back, chanted quietly ‘handbrake down’, ‘handbrake down’, pushed that damn car and mercy, you’ve guessed it, it didn’t budge an inch. My worries had shot to complete nightmare of the worst kind in a split second.
&#^**&*&% !!!
I was fuming mad. My mind was filled up with all kind of horrible things I would do to that cheap local made car or maybe, should I wait for the idiot and kick him real hard in the shins? But my strong moral and good upbringing had the best of me. I didn’t think violence would be justified
Instead, I got in my car, waited and prayed for somebody would show up, come to their senses and remove that junk of his out of my way. I kept praying.
7.32am
Nope. Nobody showed up. By now I was brimming with anger and I decided to take matters into my own hands. I reached out for a paper and a pen and did what I thought the nastiest thing I ever done to a stranger. I wrote a note - a piece of my mind. I was freaking mad cause I was wronged.
STUPID, PUT YOUR HANDBRAKE DOWN IF YOU WANT TO DOUBLE PARK. BODOH!
Instantly I felt a little relief. Well, maybe a little nervous.
I slipped the note under the wiper and then called my office that I am going to be a little late.
In a moment, I am gonna beat the crap out of somebody!
O oh. This can’t be good.
My heart was pounding like crazy yet I proceeded to my car. I put my backpack in the car, walked slowly to the back, chanted quietly ‘handbrake down’, ‘handbrake down’, pushed that damn car and mercy, you’ve guessed it, it didn’t budge an inch. My worries had shot to complete nightmare of the worst kind in a split second.
&#^**&*&% !!!
I was fuming mad. My mind was filled up with all kind of horrible things I would do to that cheap local made car or maybe, should I wait for the idiot and kick him real hard in the shins? But my strong moral and good upbringing had the best of me. I didn’t think violence would be justified
Instead, I got in my car, waited and prayed for somebody would show up, come to their senses and remove that junk of his out of my way. I kept praying.
7.32am
Nope. Nobody showed up. By now I was brimming with anger and I decided to take matters into my own hands. I reached out for a paper and a pen and did what I thought the nastiest thing I ever done to a stranger. I wrote a note - a piece of my mind. I was freaking mad cause I was wronged.
STUPID, PUT YOUR HANDBRAKE DOWN IF YOU WANT TO DOUBLE PARK. BODOH!
Instantly I felt a little relief. Well, maybe a little nervous.
I slipped the note under the wiper and then called my office that I am going to be a little late.
In a moment, I am gonna beat the crap out of somebody!
Sunday, December 9, 2007
I Hate To Brag But......
I must confess. I have only been to Genting Highland once, yes one time in my entire boring life. That’s right you merry-passport-stamping people. I know, it’s unbelievably pathetic but where else would I go if it isn’t paid for? Good point – like never. So I guess you already knew the pattern here – if it isn’t free so it’s probably not worth blogging for. That’s Mus-ism for fantabulous holiday for you.
The last time I did ever set my gorgeous foot here was like 3 years ago, where I got a free single ticket for the theme park and free cable car ride (duh!) for our Family Day from my previous still-owing money employer. But I don’t remember anything great about that place. I guess I don’t remember anything great about that previous employer of mine either.
So I abandoned the City of Entertainment after only 3 hours.
I guess a single ticket to fun ride wasn’t really something you called ‘fun’ if well, you rode it alone. It was just lame and lonely for me. It’s like having sex ‘without touching’. (Don’t ask me, it’s an outrageously peculiar concept introduced by a friend)
Anyway I am much wiser now. I do things differently. I am still not ready to pay (you got that right, mister!), but this time, I got company.
So this isn’t really a complete monster-in-the-dungeon tale. I have fun – that’s what matters the most to me. Yes, it’s still about work, yet I still managed to squeeze some precious time to enjoy what was paid for by my current beloved employers - and live to brag about it to friends. Life isn’t always fair, right?
The cool whether, the fresh mountain air and the magnificent views of the golf course - simply breathtaking, am I right?
The last time I did ever set my gorgeous foot here was like 3 years ago, where I got a free single ticket for the theme park and free cable car ride (duh!) for our Family Day from my previous still-owing money employer. But I don’t remember anything great about that place. I guess I don’t remember anything great about that previous employer of mine either.
So I abandoned the City of Entertainment after only 3 hours.
I guess a single ticket to fun ride wasn’t really something you called ‘fun’ if well, you rode it alone. It was just lame and lonely for me. It’s like having sex ‘without touching’. (Don’t ask me, it’s an outrageously peculiar concept introduced by a friend)
Anyway I am much wiser now. I do things differently. I am still not ready to pay (you got that right, mister!), but this time, I got company.
So this isn’t really a complete monster-in-the-dungeon tale. I have fun – that’s what matters the most to me. Yes, it’s still about work, yet I still managed to squeeze some precious time to enjoy what was paid for by my current beloved employers - and live to brag about it to friends. Life isn’t always fair, right?
I simply couldn’t put all these accurately in words. It simply wouldn’t justify. So I litter some of the photos I took here for your monster-green eyes.
The cool whether, the fresh mountain air and the magnificent views of the golf course - simply breathtaking, am I right?
I guess it’s only polite if you nod.
Friday, December 7, 2007
Goodbye!
Yesterday I decided to humor myself and got on the scales, which to my huge surprises – promptly registered 118kg. To my even greater chagrin, the scales stayed at that stratospheric reading.
This induced a slowly rising but soon intense state of shock; I suddenly had to confront cruel reality. This ain't funny at all!
“Maybe the scales are wrong”
“It’s that genes thing”
“I was born big bone”
So I immediately did what every man does when he has problem he cannot handle himself – I threw that damn thing away.
Goodbye pain!
This induced a slowly rising but soon intense state of shock; I suddenly had to confront cruel reality. This ain't funny at all!
“Maybe the scales are wrong”
“It’s that genes thing”
“I was born big bone”
So I immediately did what every man does when he has problem he cannot handle himself – I threw that damn thing away.
Goodbye pain!
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
He Who Hates Plastic Bags
I was on leave on Monday, a forced one. I still have 14 days to be taken and my boss has been actually pestering (threatening) me to clear all those leave before year end. And boy, was I bored out of my skull
Then like the rain unto the sea, the savior came in a shape of a friend. Awie called and asked whether I was free for a picnic at Sungai Gabai with few of his friends. (Actually only two of them)
Well, I hate to disappoint my friends, and since I was all up for some spontaneous Monday action, I guess I was kinda doing him a favor and said yes.
“You want me to bring anything?”
“Nah, just your sunny disposition and be nice”
“What if I got stumbled in the drain once again, and suddenly in no mood for being nice?”
“In that case just bring some magazines and newspapers, will ya”
I have always drawn to waterfalls. I think they are powerful, mysterious but majestic all at the same time, so I was exited about the whole trip. It has been awhile I have been, like to anywhere, so this was a real treat for me.
“…..and another thing, if you insisted on bringing anything, lay off the plastic bag ok?
Huh?
“Discarded plastics bags litter our cities, kill wildlife, block drains and hang around for decades”
HUH? Is he for real?
Maybe because he just knew me but take a look in my kitchen and he’ll find a dirty environmental secret. Lurking under the sink is a strangely inexhaustible stash of plastic bags - hundreds of them. Suddenly, I feel like a super villain in the environmentalist movie.
Maybe I should be thinking about adopting a dolphin from the World Wildlife Fund and a lemur from my local zoo. Or maybe not
Don’t tell Awie I told you this.
Then like the rain unto the sea, the savior came in a shape of a friend. Awie called and asked whether I was free for a picnic at Sungai Gabai with few of his friends. (Actually only two of them)
Well, I hate to disappoint my friends, and since I was all up for some spontaneous Monday action, I guess I was kinda doing him a favor and said yes.
“You want me to bring anything?”
“Nah, just your sunny disposition and be nice”
“What if I got stumbled in the drain once again, and suddenly in no mood for being nice?”
“In that case just bring some magazines and newspapers, will ya”
I have always drawn to waterfalls. I think they are powerful, mysterious but majestic all at the same time, so I was exited about the whole trip. It has been awhile I have been, like to anywhere, so this was a real treat for me.
“…..and another thing, if you insisted on bringing anything, lay off the plastic bag ok?
Huh?
“Discarded plastics bags litter our cities, kill wildlife, block drains and hang around for decades”
HUH? Is he for real?
Maybe because he just knew me but take a look in my kitchen and he’ll find a dirty environmental secret. Lurking under the sink is a strangely inexhaustible stash of plastic bags - hundreds of them. Suddenly, I feel like a super villain in the environmentalist movie.
Maybe I should be thinking about adopting a dolphin from the World Wildlife Fund and a lemur from my local zoo. Or maybe not
Don’t tell Awie I told you this.
Monday, December 3, 2007
Making Choices
I hate making choices. I hate limiting my options and as far as horrifying the-world-is-mine greedy goes, I want it all. But I know I can’t have it all.
In life we just have to live with those choices we made and what a cruel cruel world we live in, now that we know there are people who are bound to be disappointed with our picks. So overdramatic doesn’t even begin to describe my weekend.
I was made to choose between two good friends. One invited to me to her daughter’s birthday in Kajang while another has a free ticket to Harith Iskander and Douglas Lim‘s show (a stand up comedy show) in Bangsar. I was (literally) torn. I felt soo torn that at one point I thought I’d rather die than disappointing either of my friends (you see this is the ’overdramatic’ part I was referring to!)
And being a complete moron, I ‘kinda’ promised to be in both events! Talking about no balls, self-important, lying idiot!
So after much trials and tribulations….and some divine intervention, I finally decided that my own instant gratification has to be put forward, so I went for Bangsar’s show, knowing that later I have to endure the sub-zero treatment from my other friends.
So was it worth it?
The show was super crazy fun. I haven’t been laughing this hard since Jessica Simpson thought tuna sandwich was made from chicken. Douglas Lim was particularly a riot. The jokes were refreshing, smart and downright hilarious. It was a humorous takes on our Malaysia life without being pretentious at all.
I was thoroughly enjoyed the show and I cannot thank enough to the one man that make it all happened for me.
Herman, you know I owe one big supper next time, right?
Now, would I still send the birthday gift to her or should I just keep it for the next year?
In life we just have to live with those choices we made and what a cruel cruel world we live in, now that we know there are people who are bound to be disappointed with our picks. So overdramatic doesn’t even begin to describe my weekend.
I was made to choose between two good friends. One invited to me to her daughter’s birthday in Kajang while another has a free ticket to Harith Iskander and Douglas Lim‘s show (a stand up comedy show) in Bangsar. I was (literally) torn. I felt soo torn that at one point I thought I’d rather die than disappointing either of my friends (you see this is the ’overdramatic’ part I was referring to!)
And being a complete moron, I ‘kinda’ promised to be in both events! Talking about no balls, self-important, lying idiot!
So after much trials and tribulations….and some divine intervention, I finally decided that my own instant gratification has to be put forward, so I went for Bangsar’s show, knowing that later I have to endure the sub-zero treatment from my other friends.
So was it worth it?
I was thoroughly enjoyed the show and I cannot thank enough to the one man that make it all happened for me.
Herman, you know I owe one big supper next time, right?
At the end of the day, I still can’t decide whether it was the right choice for me and for everybody, but I know I have to live with it by now. For those friends who might be affected with the choices I made (or lack of it), I pray for your undivided love and understanding. I am only human and I hope you never failed to see that.
Now, would I still send the birthday gift to her or should I just keep it for the next year?
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