To Hell And Back!

Raya this year is a lot of pain and a lot less fun. I guess it's true when people say, when you reached a certain age in life, Raya is just another obligatory holiday people take to clear their leaves. It's no longer a long awaited fun-time like it used to be; um, you know, when we were much younger. At least then we don't have to deal with offensive questions from our intruding relatives...and we get Duit Raya for behaving ourselves.

Which brings me to my next point;

Having a decent conversation with my relatives is (urghh) impossible, it is like taking a slingshot to a pistol duel, only that they armed with remote-targeting orbital lasers, um, I mean THEIR MOUTHS.

But I have long mastered the art of face-saving while being totally polite; I pay attention to the nasty remarks made about my recent surge of body weight. Now, if they tell me 'you are gaining weight', I hiss and try to eat less in my next house, if they say 'why so fat?' I correct their grammatical error. I feel much better after that.

And if you think my misery is over after that, think again misery-guts! Answering the next question is relished as much as getting a root canal.

"So when are you getting married?"

“I read somewhere that there's a one-in-five-billion chance that you'll get hit by space debris…but now I am not so sure anymore!” I baulked

(Multiply that line by a few hundreds thousand times)

I am so tired and bored of all these ruckus on why I am fat and why I am still unmarried that I resolute to please them all next Raya. To lose few pound is easy but to get someone to fall in love with me in the next 12 months? …Well maybe, I just better off faking my own death!

Why do I suddenly feel as if my boat is sinking and someone nailed an anchor to my head?

Gee, I lost my intellectual curiosity just in time

Note: I was writing this post on the 3rd day of Raya, where I spent another 2 days on my bed due to my fever flare up caused by - I suspect - its much depressing topic.